Machete’s Really Coming?

After months of wonder and longing, one of the most unlikely movies of the upcoming season finally has a debut date. Machete, the story of a Mexican Federale turned assassin (Danny Trejo) out to kill just about everyone that has done him wrong, is set for a September 3 release to theaters, to be shown over the Labor Day weekend. Trejo will be joined in his killing spree by shotgun-wielding priest (and comic legend) Cheech Marin, who will presumably be baked through most of the death and devastation.

Since rumors of the movie first began, its been heavily debated whether this one would ever actually materialize, especially since it’s based solely on one of the fake trailers from Grindhouse. Robert Rodriguez’s baby seems to have persevered, though, even overcoming the unfortunate fate of its predecessor—which despite some initial Tarantino-brand nerdly giddiness was an absolute flop in theaters. Hell, Machete has even managed to secure Robert de Niro and Jessica Alba in supporting roles, though whether that will be enough to boost its ratings remains to be seen. Steven Seagal is also on-board but…who cares?

This movie has two roles to fill: to make me laugh, and to blow us away with some of that breathtaking Tarantino/Rodriguez style violence. In terms of dollar signs, I just don’t see it delivering. If it’s good, it will probably attain cult status, but in theaters, I think Rodriguez will be in for another depressing flop. Kudos to the both of them on that note, though—they’ve never exactly let that deter them. You have to respect a director that’s determined to see their brain child born, even if they know the green prospects aren’t grand. In this day and age, it’s certainly a unique outlook to bring to Hollywood’s doorstep.

Let’s just hope this doesn’t turn out like the first half of Deathproof. I could not handle such torturous boredom a second time around.

The infamous fake trailer from Grindhouse:

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~ by Chris G. on April 19, 2010.

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